Avengers ReAssembled
by rsbstarz
Summary: Over a year after New York. The Avengers have a new assignment - they have to get to know each other.
1. Chapter 1

It had been about year since the Avengers had last been all together in one place, but now it seemed that Fury wanted them to gather together in his flying fortress. So here they were, all sat around the table, the only people missing were Tony, Thor and Fury himself.

"So, is Thor counted to turn up?" Steve asked curiously, looking around the table.

Bruce looked up half startled that someone decided to speak. It had been so long since they had spoken to each other that an awkward presence was in the air. "…erm perhaps not?" he replied uncertain of the answer.

"But he's part of the Avengers so I would say Fury somehow reined him in." Natasha added looking at Bruce with a small smile on her lips. The awkward presence was slowly fading away.

"He's worlds away! You expect the guy to turn up for _fun_?" Clint exclaimed.

"20 dollars says your wrong." Natasha raised her eyebrow at Clint seeing if her team mate would accept.

"How about a date instead?" Clint raised the bet after careful consideration of his options.

Natasha looked at him to match her side of the bet, "If you win. But if I win, you are to be my slave for an entire 24 hours." She looked at him to see if he would accept terms.

"As long as it's ethical, you're on." Clint grinned at her, full of confidence, while Natasha just gave him a sly look.

Steve looked around feeling his question unanswered. "Thanks for clearing that up", clearly annoyed.

"We've been waiting over an hour and neither Tony nor Fury has even shown up. So do we even have to be here?" Bruce said impatiently finally standing up.

"Yeah but we all know why Tony's late, his very distracted by a_ little_ Pepper." Clint said amusingly looking at towards Bruce.

"Watch your mouth." Steve said sensing Clint's meaning.

"Why Cap, afraid to get it on?" Clint said meeting Steve's stare. Natasha feeling the tension decided to change topic.

"So Bruce where've you been all this time? No text, no call, just plain, old, big, fat, _green_ nothing." She knew she shouldn't have but she couldn't just not mention it. Especially when she knew Bruce still felt that he owed her, for running at her months before.

"I was finding some peace." He said staring at her blankly, not appreciating the reference. None of them noticing who had just entered their rendezvous point.

"Yeah blending in with the rainforest." He sauntered straight into the room towards the table.

"How's Pepper_ coming_?" Clint asked looking straight at Steve's red face. Neither of them looking away from their competition.

"She's good thanks for asking. I just left her with loads of sheets to tidy up." Tony answered, to which Clint started to laugh his head off, Natasha let out a little chuckle, Bruce releasing a big smile and Steve's face started to go red. Tony raised an eyebrow to Steve to explain making him go even redder than before while he sat down on a chair crossing his legs. But the laughter stopped due to the sudden burst of Thor's voice.

"How it is nice to see my Midgardian friends again!" Thor's deep voice boomed across the entire room. Natasha smiled at Clint wiggling her eyebrows.

"Deals a deal." His face blank to which all the things she could now make him do.

"Well now that Shakespeare's here I say we can rock the party without Fury."

"You sure as hell ain't rocking_ this_ party Stark." Fury appeared with a couple of agents behind him.

"About time you turned up. Isn't it rude to invite people to an event, then you as the host are late? Having manners got booted out of the window by the 21st century didn't it?" Steve said annoyed at Fury for if he hadn't kept them waiting, all the remarks need not have been said.

"Well you would have first-hand knowledge about it, wouldn't you_ capsicle_?" he teased with a smile on his face.

He nodded but replied with a smile, "True but you're a fine example of my theory wouldn't you say?"

"_Stop_. You lot can go on for hours on end. So just stop. Play mummies and daddies later." Fury said putting an end to one of the 'discussions' he liked to call them knowing that the actual word would be childish bickering.

"I agree, let the man who _summoned_ us, do the talking so we can all get the hell out of here." Bruce said. Fury nodded towards the doctor in slight appreciation.

"So it's been over a year since you were _all_ together and I think it's time for you all too just spend some time together as the Avengers. You know, it is a team thing and teams do work together so that they _understand_ each other." Fury said looking around at each of them while walking around the table.

Tony not being able to help himself, "Okay, okay jeez I get where you're going. So how about my place? I've thought about it briefly just once and you're all going to love it. I'll throw you all a party and let you experience yours truly." He pointed towards his chest with a grin on his face.

"I don't want to _experience_ anything of yours." Clint smirked knowing Tony full well for what he meant.

"Well how do you know you won't miss out?" Tony said defending himself.

Natasha smiled and decided to join in, "No one's going to miss out when there's_ nothing_ there to see."

"Let alone something that's been used many a time before, it just gets _unreliable_." Bruce couldn't help but join in. He discovered early on that the saying 'if you can't beat 'em, join 'em' really did apply to The Avengers.

"Seriously guys." Steve noticing what they we're actually talking about, while Thor was completely lost.

"I don't get it. What's there to experience? I don't see anything out of the usual." Thor said, confusion written all of over his face. Their laughter started once again.

"By the time I'm done with you, you'll never be the same." Tony smiled, placing a hand on Thor's shoulder, confusing the God even more.

"So it's agreed. You are all to spend at least three months living together as well as spending time with one another."

"By the way, my house, my rules." Tony added quickly.

"We're living together for three months." Natasha said smiling on a fact she already knew.

"So?" Tony questioned her.

"So, rules are made to be broken." She finished off.

"Not in my house. I'm starting to think I've actually done something wrong by generously offering my hospitality for us to bond and here you are already threatening my threshold."

"Since when are you generous, world war 3?" Steve said, finally giving up.

"Ouch, below the belt. When are you going to let it go? I was young, naïve and ignorant – we all make mistakes." Tony said, looking down at his watch briefly.

"I'm starving. Where's the food." The God was always hungry.

"Food is dished out when it's scheduled to be." Fury said walking over to the bridge.

"When's that?" The God said standing up.

"Not till another 3 hours." Fury replied over his shoulder.

Thor looked at everyone. "How do you people live on so little? In 3 hours I should be a rotting corpse on its way to a burial ground."

"Well then before we all have to sadly say good bye to you Edwardian hero, we must dine. So Furry, mind dropping us off at my place?" Tony's excitement couldn't be hidden in his voice. He needed to know more about their preferences for a little something he was doing for them all.

Fury gave a nod to his assistant to do so.


	2. Chapter 2

**_A/N:_**

**_Miss America of the USA - Reason why I wrote it like that was because I just didn't think I could write it like a normal story with this many characters. It got a bit confusing for me as I wrote it how I did but this chapter I tried writing it normal-like for you :)_**

* * *

It didn't take them long at all to arrive at Tony's estate. None of them apart from Natasha had been there before so they didn't expect Tony's house to be…well, to be so sophisticated. Coming in through the hallway they saw lots of art pieces around the place. Clint and Thor lingered in the hallway taking it all in.

"Woah, this place definitely says whipped." Clint spoke first.

"Whipped? Where are the horses?" Thor asked with pure innocent curiosity causing Clint to stop and look at Thor with a raised eyebrow.

"You're really not playing dumb?" Clint said amusingly.

"I got this one…It's referred to when the female in the relationship has dominance over the man. Right?" Steve said over hearing the question as he came inside the house, walking straight past them. The rest of them had already made it to the living room but Tony had made his way back to check on the missing trio that had disappeared.

"Hey Legolas, Cap, and Thor do you all find my hall way so fascinating that you're willing to stay there for the next couple of months? 'Cause I can really do with some pets." Tony called out towards them with a smirk.

"Pet? How dare you compare me to a pet! I am the King of Asgard, Master of thunder…"

"Seriously? Take a joke. Lighten up. You shouldn't get your cape in a twist." Tony now added, coming forward with an amused look on his face.

Clint seeing his moment to insult took it. "What like, if you look up the word joke in a dictionary, your picture would be there?"

"That's more like it. No getting angry and smashing. Use words. Go ahead compliment me." Tony said looking past Thor towards a window to fix his hair in the reflection.

Thor sensed that both of them were waiting for him to say something, "What like how you're so self-obsessed it can be compared to a woman's trait?"

"Well done! Considering you got the brain the size of a pea but yeah congrats. But here's a, tip don't let Pep or Nat hear you say that."

"Sir, this is the reminder that the pizza will be here in 10 minutes." Jarvis said suddenly without wavering.

"Mmm Food, Thanks Jarvis. Hear that guys? Pizza." Tony said gesturing for them to move towards the living room.

"Also Miss Potts says that, 'Tony, you listen to me right now. You leave me alone like that again swamped in your paper work ever again I will make sure that there is no coffee for you for an entire day, got it? Seriously the amount of sheets that actually need to be signed is ridiculous!'." Jarvis played back the voice message Pepper had left Tony.

"Who is this? Show your face oh mysterious voice." Thor said looking around, his Hammer up in a defensive stance.

"Boy, oh boy, oh boy. Hammer Head, put down the hammer. J if you care to explain." Tony said motioning for the two to follow him in to the living room.

"My name is Jarvis. Thor son of Odin of Asgard, I am an artificial intelligent system created by Tony Stark."

"What is that?"

"In other words sir, I am the voice of Tony's computer system."

"Oh the metal contraptions you all surround yourselves with. Thank you, Jarvis of the artificial intelligent systems." Thor said as they reached the living room.

"So, where are we all sleeping?" Bruce put in, looking slightly out of place.

"Yeah, I think some of us…" Tony looked around the room. "All of us need to freshen up before dinner. J?"

"Yes sir?" came an immediate reply.

"Show Steve, Nat and Bruce to their rooms. I'll show the other two."

"Of course sir. If you would kindly follow my lights." Jarvis led them in the opposite direction to where Tony led Clint and Thor.

"So how many _sheets_ does Pepper have to clean up thanks to you?" Clint referred to the voicemail, teasingly while wiggling his eyebrows to Thor behind Tony's back making Thor a little confused.

Tony sensing the suggestion and his pride at risk started, "Well…no, never mind she'll kill me or even worse...put me on_ hold_."

"Then don't say. I wouldn't want a fellow man not _getting some_ 'cause of me...actually it's you so it doesn't really apply and you're not even classified as a man...more like boy wouldn't you say Thor?" Clint teased with a smile to show that he was joking.

"Boy, oh yes….What's getting some? And what's with the sheets?"

Tony feeling frustrated as he was took a deep breath and started explaining. "Well both leads to sex. Sheets as in bed sheets and getting…well just getting some."

"Then never tell us how much you _get some_ with Pepper. That woman is _scary_." Thor said stopping to shake his head in a shiver like manner.

"Why's she scary?" Clint stopped to ask; knowing what ever Thor had to say would be funny.

"Yeah…What he said?" Why would a God be scared of a human woman?

"She has red hair and a threatening temper. Reminds me of my grandmother."

"So what you're saying is that you find my girl scary because she has ginger hair and reminds you of your _grandmother_?"

"You've never met my grandmother and pray that you never shall. She has this stick – well it's more like a branch and she chases you with it until she hits on the head, _hard_."

Tony and Clint looked at each other briefly before cracking you up while Thor stood there utterly immersed in a memory. His face told them that he was being serious and he was actually scared recalling the memory.

"It is not funny. Be thankful she has gone in to the realm of sleep, so you have very little chance to meet with her."

Which just caused the other two men to even laugh harder. They eventually they stopped and made it to the guest room Clint would be staying in.

"Well this is your room Clint. See you in 15." Clint nodded and walked off shaking his head in amusement.

"15?"

"You have a _lot_ to learn. Minutes Shakespeare. Minutes." Tony and Thor continued to another door way and Tony gestured for him to go in.

"I see. I do not like this Shakespeare you refer to me as. Who is he?"

"Ask Jarvis, he'll fill you in with anything you want to know. Anyways you're in your room."

"In…15?" Thor tried to make it sound natural but it just didn't work.

"Yeah kinda, you need practice. And oh if you get lost just tell J you want to go to the living room. That's where the food is."

_*10 minutes later*_

After Thor had placed his hammer down and took of his cape and armour and replaced it with Midgardian clothes of jogging bottoms and a plain white t-shirt. He couldn't remember what room Tony said they would all be in so he took the advice that he had received from the man of iron.

"Voice of the system?"

"Computer?" He tried again to gain attention from the machine.

"Yes sir?" Replied Jarvis immediately, causing Thor to jump slightly.

"May you show me the way to food?"

"The kitchen Sir?"

"Is that where the food is?"

"Yes."

"Then lead me to it."

"Right this way sir."

* * *

**_A/N: Well? Better or worse written like this? If it's better I'll change the 1st chapter to look like this._**


	3. Chapter 3

Tony did a quick head count as he came back into the living room. Clint was sitting next to the Cap talking about the F1 race being held in Singapore that weekend and Natasha and Bruce looking at something on her phone. "Where's that Son of a God?" Tony asked stopping at the entrance.

"Jesus? Thing is he hasn't resurrected yet. Don't worry when I hear of his return, you'll be the first person I tell." Clint replied with a smirk knowing that his answer hadn't helped but he received a quick slap on the head from Steve.

"No blasphemy." Steve ordered him after slapping Clint's head.

"Thanks for you _excellent _help as always and Marty Mcfly my house my rules." Tony said looking at Clint and then Steve. A thud could be heard coming from somewhere in the house making them all stop what they were doing and look at everyone and their surroundings. After a moment of silence and not hearing anything else they continued.

"Who's Marty Mcfly?" Steve asked questioningly at Bruce.

"Come on, Back to the Future?" Bruce explained receiving a blank look from Steve, he looked at Tony. "Tony?"

"Already on it…" Tony said while looking down at his phone to order the film, he couldn't let Steve _not_ watch it. "…and ordered." He said looking up just as the doorbell rang. Clint using his quick reflexes made for the door before anyone else even tripping Natasha up along the sprint.

He stopped at the door to take a deep breath and then opened the door. "Why hello there. Lost? Or have you come to feed me finally." Clint said wiggling his eyebrows while giving a seduction look at the pizza delivery guy.

"Clint, stop harassing the lovely guy, who has kindly bought us food." Steve said smiling sympathetically at the pizza guy resisting the urge to slap Clint on the head again.

"With Steve on this one kiddo, it's really creepy when you do that." Tony said while taking some money out of his wallet.

"It's not creepy is it Natasha?" Clint said looking for support. She was rubbing her neck from where Clint had pushed her.

With a smile, she replied "I'm just gonna go look for Thor." While walking out of the room.

"Nat!" Clint exclaimed annoyed that she didn't support him.

Natasha could still hear the guys bickering in the other room but her mind was elsewhere. Thor was being very quiet which is extremely out of character and basically impossible for him to do so.

"Jarvis?"

"Yes, Miss Romanov?"

"Where is the current location of Thor?"

"He is in the kitchen."

Nothing good can come out of Thor being in the kitchen when he's hungry and boy was she right. As she came closer she could hear the rustling of packets being opened and when she came to the door way she just smiled.

Cupboards had been opened and ransacked. The top door hinge of the fridge had broken and was left hanging. Empty packets, jars, bottles and other various packaging had been left, well _everywhere_. And Thor? He was sitting in a corner happily munching on some pop-tarts.

"Wow you really are an ape!" Natasha commented.

"What is this _ape_ everyone likes to call me?" Thor asked but he didn't wait for an answer and continued to chew on the pop-tarts happily, "Pop-tarts are so _good_."

"Well, since we're here and I wanna see the look on Tony's face when he sees this. I'm grabbing some ice cream…" She paused to look around at Thor. "You didn't eat the ice cream did you?"

"No, I haven't opened the other door yet." Thor said with a mouthful of pop tart.

"Please close your mouth when you chew and speak when you've swallowed. It's called manners." She said walking over to the fridge and then moving it slightly so that she could open the freezer door.

"Manners?" Thor said looking up questioningly at Natasha. "Where I come from it is a sign of good manners."

"Well here on Earth it's bad and while we're at it, I may as well teach you other mannerism of a gentleman." She explained while looking for the ice cream. She found Ben & Jerry's, she was in luck.

"I don't want to be a_ gentle_-man. That would imply I am weak."

"Not weak. It's…well only perfect men do it and girls find it attractive. Is that enough for you –"

She was cut off by Thor exclaiming, "Sit down with your ice cream and teach me woman, for my ears are all yours." While yanking her down to sit with him on the floor.

_20 minutes later_ _in the living room_

"That's it. We've done our waiting."

"Yeah, 12 years of it in Azkaban!..." Clint stopped after receiving looks from Tony and Bruce. "_What_? Come on you set it all up. I just _had_ to."

"Enough yapping." Tony chose not to comment on it, "Get up. We're going to go find them." Tony said giving Clint a look to be quiet. "Jarvis cut our searching short. Where are they?"

"If you are referring to Thor and Miss Romanov sir, they are in the kitchen." Jarvis replied not commenting to what they have done or are doing.

"In the kitchen? What are they…" Tony cut off to the sound of a _thump _which came from the kitchen.

Tony ran towards the kitchen, everyone else following quietly.

He stood at the doorway, Clint and Steve squeezing past him. Bruce just silently stood beside Tony and put placed a hand on his shoulder out of sympathy after seeing that the fridge door had fallen off the hinges and hit the floor. As soon as Clint got passed, he dashed straight towards the two sitting on the floor, kneeling down beside Natasha like a child.

"Nat, what flavour is that?" Clint asked going to kneel beside her. Natasha offered the tub of ice cream over to Clint. He looked around deciding whether or not he should find a spoon but with all the mess he decided to just use his finger instead, nobody complained.

"Mmm…Chocolate fudge." Clint said, helping himself to more.

Thor sitting next to them looked at the ice cream then his pop-tart and decided he wanted to try them together. It resulted of the three in a small tug of war with the ice cream tub.

Steve on the other hand was assessing the damage done to the area and moved the fridge door out of harm's way. He looked over at Tony about to speak but stopped due to Tony's face. He followed Tony's gaze at the three adults that were behaving as immaturely as children.

"Tony?" Steve said in a gentle tone. "I know your kitchen looks bad but we can sort it out." Steve said calmly, stepping closer to Tony thinking that was his problem.

Tony snapped out of his trance and looked over at Steve.

"Never mind my freaking kitchen, _MY POP-TARTS_. You. Ate. My. Pop-tarts." Tony steamed going over to Thor to grab the empty box of pop-tarts from beside him. He then looked over at the other empty boxes.

"My supply of pop-tarts, _gone_-"

"You're more concerned that your pop-tarts are gone and not the state of your kitchen?" Steve asked, shocked at Tony's response.

"Kitchen smitchen. My pop-tarts are gone." Tony whined while pulling a face whilst staring at the empty box.

"My friend, they were good pop-tarts and now they have gone to a better place." Thor said getting up and patting his stomach.

"Day one, I never thought I'd say this but you, me outside in 5." Tony said as he tried to storm off but was cut off by a man wearing black.


End file.
